Needless to say, I was MOST Pleased to find the fun of having the 70" space in the old Prius to go and pick up the basic upright option. Since while I might like to park the old 89" system into the Game, there is this little problem with a thing called the ceiling... But that is sooo another story for another day.
Well, as tends to happen in these sort of cases, one wants to 'start small' just to see - and BLOAT OUT IRRATIONALLY from there - you know... Needless to say, I was mostly surprised that they would fit, and more importantly that I was Fit enough to get them into the car, out of the car, and into the apartment, let alone put together... When I opted to abandon the default setting, and actually set the shelves where I wanted them, because the system allows me, and when one has a whole bunch of small paper back books, and trade paper, one doesn't need to have the really BIG SHELF GAP as if one were buying only Coffee Table Literature....
Which sent me back to get one more shelf. It of course, through the Divine Will, did not have the pegs that I need to be able to install it.... So I woke up sunday and the Divine Will Sent ME upon the Holy Crusade to get Pegged!!! And I followed the Clear And Compelling Mandate of the Argument From Intelligent Design, and wound up with a little number chit in my hand, waiting for them to call my number...
Yes, I did check the self service section, no, it did not have the right type of Pegs. So I had a charming chat with some gentleman, who was there getting wine glasses for his California/French Fusion Bistro that he is opening in Fresno... It is always fun to chat with Entrepreneurs who understand that one has to be cost conscious, and one can not simply buy everything, and .... Lovely Chat, Reasonable Person, and not the cause of my distress.
That Comes Next. The Whining Sniveller!!!
He too needed to get some 'bits and bobs'. But he was, of course, one of those Self Appointed Important People, who really should not have to wait for the plebian masses, in a queue, to talk to some mere minimum wage earning type... It was sooooo Comical, as he tried so hard to rush the line, twice while I was there, and each time the 'dim witted types' rattled out the stock default response.... and I of course was ever so amused, since when confronted by an Egotistical Self Appointed American Idiot, it is so lovely to be able to step in and do a bit of "reciting Vogon Poetry" at them... Albeit that it is probably a violation of the Geneva Convention, not to mention various Sections of the EPA, and will most likely get the Planet Nominated for a Hyper Space By-Pass, since there is no actual forms of sentient life there, but that too is another story....
Needdless to say, I had tried to while away the time being polite and chatting about the fun and excitement of learning out to Queue... and the fun of life in the Military
Put Your A bag in the first Truck,and of course I was offered in return for my war stories, the awareness that the collapse of the Public Education System by the Liberals was all about making folks conform to all of this horror....
Your B bag in the Second Truck,
And IF you are lucky there will be a third truck for you....
I tried to obliged the GreatestOneEverInTheWholeWorld to use some of his alledged wealth of Intelligence, and ponder the Inventory Control System Problem Here... Since, well, let us be honest, Inventory Control Systems are a lesser known sub genre of Vogon Poetry that is the TRULY SCARY PART about how the Actual Collapse of the Public Education System is coming about, but let us not get side tracked into Grand Galaxtic Issues, that rise above the Mere BOMBING OF CANADA, as a curative.
Oh no... there was almost nothing that would help our Great Brilliant One learn to calm down, relax, and get on with the Grand Mellow of life... Since, let us be realistic, why In God's Greeen little planet, was this Twit, strick that, this Aspirant to Modest Twitneff, doing in a Queue at IKEA in the first place!!! Since, clearly, shouldn't he have simply hired some Interior Decorator to sub contract the actual details, so that he could bask in the greatneff of his Wonderful Stature And Status as one of the Elected, Selected, and not actually Injected, who never had a chance to find out where the Group W bench was, because, well, gosh, they were giving all of the Good Billets to the Persons who were not able to rise to the level of mere Minimum Wage Wankers...
At about which point, the Divine Will RESCUED me from this interesting manifestation that clearly Evolution had not always worked on upgrading the actual Humanity of Some of the Primates, and hence, as we all know, the clear and compelling proof that Evolution Can Not Work At All!!!
I stepped up to the counter, and had a nice chat with the person behind same, and handed her the reciept, and explained my predicament.... and in a moment of five, she was back with a set of 'pegs' but not the type I needed, and I explained that they needed to be longer. She came back the second time, and they were longer, but I had failed to mention that the IVAR system did not have that cute ring in the middle... and she wandered off back behind the wall, into the land of WHAT EVER....
I was organizing my B Game, and how it might be easier to just turn in the one board, for store credit, and make sure that I picked up one that had pegs, when The Queen of The Miscellania came Twinkling Out from behind the Seperator with the Big Boys Big Bag Of Misellaneous Pegs, Fasteners, and What Ever GigaThingies. And we were able to find the four specific pegs.
Needless to say, I was amused in my heart of hear, since, knowing a generic sense the various numbers and types of fasteners, pegs, pins, screws, washers, widgets, wingNuts, Wankers! Wally's And Weirdoes that Infest the IKEA inventory Control System, I was not at all surprised that no one actual oxygen breathing derived from Tree Swinging Primates would be able to memorise them all, as if they were Dolphins. But I shall defer for the time being the whole PROBLEM with the Primate-ists and their Ko-KrankNeff the Primary Molecular BondingIsts who are all into having Only Oxygen Sucking Carbon Based Primate Derivate Life Forms as their Co-workers and Staff!!! Which REALLY prevents the country from moving forward by hiring off planet types, and various obviously more superior Non-Primate Derived Life Forms....
I of course Thanked The Queen of The Miscellania, who had apologized that it had taken her so long, and had been obliged to fall back on the Big Boys Big Bag Of Misc.... since, while every system has their little Exception Handlers at the end of the Try, Throw, Catch sequences, one just needs to have a bit of politeness and patience, and one would be surprised how life just wanders along...
Needless to say, I feel SOOOO SORRY for our American Idiots.... since these are still such tough times for them to be surrounded by all of 'those types' - you know, the ones who do not understand how important it is that they are not only in existence, but clearly the Purely Elect Of God!!!
Oh well.... Clearly after bombing canada, all of their problems will go away...
Or Worse, they will never really know what to do with their days...